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are you done yet?
“Why yes mom, watching you write is the most riveting thing I’ll do all day. Keep going, I’m not bored at all.” -Jax, the dog who never ever leaves my side while I’m in my office
you are not crazy.
“I can take a lot of crazy shit from a lot of crazy people but you, you are not crazy.” girl, interrupted
finally set up my home office
We moved in our house in October, and we still aren’t even close to settled.
Now that I’m getting busier as a freelance writer (crazy exciting!), I figured it was time I started arranging my home office. I usually work off of my laptop but setting up at my desk and desktop has a nice touch.
I finally put up my first published article, along with an scholarship plaque that I want. And, of course, my sign that says “behind every successful woman is a strong cup of coffee”…..as evidenced by the coffee cup on my desk…
i’m officially reviewed!
I received my first professional review as a freelance writer yesterday. Honestly, it shocked me to my core because it was the kindest, most flattering thing, and something I truly never expected. It seemed to validate what I’ve been working on and towards, and make me feel like I’m not looney tunes for thinking I’m onto something.
And! I’m in the works of getting a really exciting gig. More to come later!
And #2! I’m 2.5 lbs down on Weight Watchers!
As a mother of two I’m going to let you in on a secret closely guarded by the parents of the world: having kids is overrated, and you don’t have to do it. No matter how many women (it’s always the women) accost you at dinner parties demanding to know why your uterus remains a […]
via By the Way, You Don’t Have to Breed — The Disco Pants Blog
If.
I’ve seen you a few times since then. Sometimes we spoke, sometimes we pretended we were just strangers passing by. I don’t think I could ever forget you, although you never meant anything to me. I doubt I meant anything to you either. But we never really had closure. We just…stopped.
If I saw you today, I’d get a cup of coffee with you. I’d ask you the usuals, how’ve you been, how’s your life. I’d reluctantly ask if you’re seeing anyone, hoping not to sound too interested. I’d ask what you’re doing now, are you still writing? Working in the arts? Still living in the city? You’d see the ring on my finger and ask how long I’ve been married. I’d tell you I married a boy from our high school. You’d probably laugh and think I settled. I’d tell you I didn’t. You’d ask if I have kids, and now it’s my turn to laugh. I try to imagine you as a father. Of course you’ve probably matured since the last time we spoke. The last time we….
If I saw you today, I’d be reminded of the time we made out in the elevator. I’d be reminded of how you kissed me like you were never going to see me again. I’d be reminded of how I couldn’t get enough of you. I’d be reminded of the drunk calls at 1 in the morning. I’d be reminded of how you smiled at me the first time I saw you, after all that. I’d be reminded of how most of all, I enjoyed talking to you. Sure, you could kiss like no other but, we had a connection. And that was something no one else knew about us. Let’s face it, they knew everything else.
I do still think about you. And I doubt we’ll ever have that cup of coffee. But I do wonder what you’re doing now. If you’ve found a good woman who loves you for who you are. If you’re happy.
if you don’t know me by now
I’ve always thought of my parents when I heard this song. One night, when I got especially tipsy, I told them this and they agreed. It seemed to describe their relationship to a T. I know firsthand they have been through more than most couples could even imagine. But even now, 30 something years later, I can still see how much they love each other. They may not be able to take big romantic vacations but it’s the little things they do for each other every day.
Now that I’m a married woman, blissfully happy I might add, I hear this song and think of my own relationship. Shortly before we were married, we went through something that probably would’ve broke most couples. I did something pretty unforgiveable, yet my now husband never left my side. We fought, we shared feelings, we made ground rules. I learned that if I want to be married, I need to grow the…you know..up. I need to man up. He helped me to get through what I was experiencing, and without him – I’m not sure I’d be where I am now. I can’t even imagine the strength and patience it took him to deal with me then, but he did it. And I could never thank him enough.
Before that, I should add, that we spent the first four-five years of our relationship long-distance. My husband went away to college while I stayed at home. At first I only saw him a few times a year, but once he started playing college sports, his family was kind enough to bring me along when they went to his games each weekend. We had a routine, away games I saw him for a quick smile, and as my husband isn’t much for public affection, that’s about it. Home games I got to actually talk to him, we’d go out to dinner (woohoo…), and we’d drive hours home.
We did that for a few years, and we did break up once, that very first year. My husband needed some space, to figure out what he wanted, who he wanted. The whole thing was silly, to be honest. He was single, ready to mingle, but he dated me. Literally. Maybe we just needed some freedom to realize we didn’t really want it at all. I went on a date with someone and it was terrible, and I realized I didn’t want to be with anyone else either. Once we got back together, there was no tearing us apart.
We got engaged a few years later, and the rest was history. I think what makes us work is we have a mutual respect for one another, and a mutual trust. I don’t try to control him, nor he I. I don’t need to tell him what’s wrong, he just knows. I know he would be there in a second if I needed him, for anything. (And I have, I literally called him at work because I forgot my house keys. Yeah.) He takes care of me, in the most intimate ways. At first it surprised me, he surprised me. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. It never did.
I’m a woman, I have hormones, and sometimes I drink too much, so I tend to overreact. There I admitted it. So sometimes I try to find things he did wrong or something he didn’t say. But at the end of the day, he still tucks me in at night. He still makes me margaritas when I’m having a hard day (and didn’t even ask), he holds my hand in a crowded mall, he handles me.
So, if we don’t know each other by now, we never ever will.
Going for It.
Well folks, I’m going for it.
What is “it”, you ask?
My dream. My goals. My desired life.
As most of you could have gathered, I like to write. The only, I repeat only, goal/hope/dream/desire that has remained since childhood is that of becoming a published writer. I wrote all the time as a kid, creating stories, fantasies, adaptations (I wrote a real-life version of Cinderella in elementary school and was so proud of it!), etc. I remember asking my teachers in grade school for topics I could research and write reports on. (That got embarrassing fast, when the teachers wanted me to present said reports to my peers….) My stories/papers were commonly kept by teachers as “examples”, and I honestly never felt so proud.
Today, my writing is just beginning to be discovered. I’m writing for my state nursing association, both blog and magazine. I’m excited that I can combine my career with my passion, but I think I’m more excited that people actually like what I’m writing. Anyone can think they are good at something, but until it’s validated by others, it can be a very lonely process.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the future, and what I really want out of it. I don’t want to be working my current job forever. There are plenty of other things I’d like to work towards. Including writing. I haven’t given up that dream, and now that I’m getting a tiny response to my writing, the spark has been ignited.
I’m starting with doing lots of research on becoming a freelance writer, and today, I created an online portfolio! Yay! That’s a huge step for me. And I’m so very excited.
So, here’s to the future.
The Puppy Chronicles: 1st Birthday!
My little dude turns 1 today!
From this:
To this:
I gotta tell ya, I’ve had dogs all my life, and we currently have another dog besides this little dude (ha, not little anymore at 75lbs), but there is something special about this one.
I’ve never felt such unconditional love, no not love – because all my dogs have given me that – but adoration, like this dog has shown me.
My older dog is my protector, and for this I’m eternally grateful, but this pup… he sure worships me. I feel a connection with him that I don’t think I’ve felt with any other dog. He’s also completely different than any dog I’ve ever had, and probably the most stubborn.
So, today we celebrate Opie. 1 year old. Already. Why can’t dogs live forever?
bee writes. 